My doctor seems to think that this anxiety thing is temporary, so she gave me a “temporary” fix.
I don’t mind thinking positively, I won’t always have anxiety because my medication can take care of it, or I can learn to handle it. But the fact that it is still there, the fact that I face it every single day, and some days are worse than others, I’m not sure how “temporary” this is.
When I first saw the new doctor, and saw all the loving concern in her eyes due to the cuts on my arm, I thought that maybe she wanted to lock me up. But she was convinced that I wouldn’t do it again. She gave me something for the overwhelming anxiety I had been dealing with, and a new antidepressant, saying that we were treating me like I was bipolar (I still don’t understand what that means). Then I saw her two weeks later, for a different reason, and she asked how everything was going. Well, at the time, it was going better.
I have made my anxiety pills last me for over a month. I had it filled in April, I believe. I just looked it up, it was April 23. So from then until yesterday, I had made my clonazepam last with no refills. As I posted earlier, since there were no refills, they had to fax the doctor. I picked up the pills today. 30 tablets, no refills. Really?
So, I’m guessing that maybe this is her way of saying “make an appointment”. She said that she wanted to see me again in a month, that was back in May. So I guess it’s time.
I made an appointment with my therapist yesterday. I haven’t seen her in…well…several months. I’ll be seeing her on Thursday. I think that she will be excited to know that I have been placed on something for my anxiety.
It concerns me though…this “temporary” fix for a “temporary” problem, that honestly seems like a permanent problem. I think that I have come a long way, but I still have issues. Especially when it pertains to work.
Temporary. I’m not sure that I like that word.